Revelife just did a post on this (link), and it inspired me so much I'm gonna do one of my own! Here's a comment I left on that entry:

I think monogamy today is fading because we are so obsessed with a "me first" culture. Consequently, we've lost sight of what it really means to be in love. Love does not mean feeling goopy and smitten with someone every day for the rest of your life; it's a promise to serve that person in every way, putting your own needs last, even during the days when they downright piss you off.

The media loves to parade couples who are still in the "infautation" stage in movies. They always end with a kiss and an implied happy ending; that is rarely ever true. Relationships come with their own unique set of problems, but that's no reason to give up and call it quits. Moving on to another person is just going to repeat the same cycle all over again.

Another problem is that so many people rely on their spouses to satisfy them completely. They think "If only I could get married, then I'll never feel lonely again." Guess what! Even married people get lonely sometimes. We're a culture that loves to find our identity and satisfaction in THINGS or MERE PEOPLE, nothing that is eternal.

I had a bit of trouble believing my own words there. I've learned that there's a big difference between "head knowledge" and "heart knowledge." It's easy for my heart to think my head is full of crap when this guy I went on a date with doesn't call me back or when all my friends are getting engaged and having babies or when Valentine's Day comes around and I feel like the only one without that "special someone."

But I don't need to be married or in a relationship to know that it's still possible to feel lonely and unfulfilled even with that special someone in your life. I've been in love at least once and I can tell you, the beginning stage is great, you feel like you're walking on clouds and pissing out rainbows, but after a while, a person's flaws start to show through that aww-shucks exterior...and maybe they'll start to annoy you a bit. Maybe they'll break some promises. Forget your birthday. These things in moderation aren't deal breakers (though circumstances may vary). But too many people are looking for that "perfect" guy or girl and I want to slap them and say, there aren't any! Stop kidding yourself! Only God is perfect!!!!! Sometimes it sucks to be human.

So...is monogamy really on its way out? I saw this special on Oprah about a "typical couple" (you know they're not so "typical" if they made it on Oprah!) who have been married for like, 12 years, have two young kids, love each other passionately, blah blah blah...except the wife has a boyfriend. The husband is completely okay with it. That's just messed up. If you really love someone, why would you want to share them with someone else (in the non-creepy way of course)????

Some things I just don't get. And for that I am very thankful!

Religious people (Christians in particular) are always the ones getting criticized for evangelizing. But the very people who do the criticizing are the same ones who are, more often than not, also guilty of the exact same thing.

The word "evangelize" does have religious connotations to it. Everyone has their own thoughts and beliefs that they share with others, though not everyone has an agenda behind them, an underlying desire to convince people to see things their way. But a lot of people do. In light of the recent preachers I've seen on my college campus, and after witnessing the responses of several angry students who don't like being told that the way they think and live is wrong, I feel compelled to point out that evangelism, in the sense that everyone has a message they want the entire world to know and agree with, is not just a Christian practice.

I recently saw a preacher surrounded by a group of students, and the atmosphere was just heating up when I walked by. I heard people whispering how wrong that guy was to come and interrupt their lives like that. I heard people say that he was wrong to tell them that [insert vice here] was wrong just because HE says it is (or, more specifically, because "a dusty old book says it is"). The phrase "You're wrong!" is a common one when dealing with people of differing opinions, I've noticed. And what always comes after "You're wrong!"? An explanation for why the accuser is right, of course. Doesn't matter which side of the religious/political spectrum you're on. The fact is, we all have a specific message that correlates to our lives, one that enables us to resort to drastic measures to spread to the world, whether that requires voting, passing out flyers, Bibles, or writing to our legislatures.

My point with all this is, everyone preaches. Even you, I'm sure. We all know that religious people do it on street corners from time to time, to make sure the Good News is spread to all (and that's a pretty noble thing if you can put yourself in the Christian mindset for a moment). Advertisments preach the "good news" of their products all the time as well. Cosmopolitan preaches the pleasure of sex by featuring a new position every month, and insists you won't know what you're missing until you try it (now how do they know if you're missing anything in your sex life, anyway? How presumptuous! How dare they!). Why are these annoying, redundant messages more tolerated than the religious ones?

So next time you see someone on campus or on the street or anywhere you need to go to get to work or to class who is "preaching," don't automatically jump to the conclusion that they are in the wrong simply because they are passionate about something. I'll admit, I cringe at some of the methods that are used to spread the word, but that's another issue. We all have our reasons for believing that certain lifestyles and practices are wrong, but we are doing a great disservice to the validity of our own message (whatever that may be) by refusing to listen to others and respecting them on a strictly human-to-human level.

There are a few moments in life when we hear of a young person with some ridiculously amazing talent and/or acheivement of some sort that makes the rest of us older folks (though the use of "old" and "young" are definitely relative depending on who you talk to!) scratch our heads and wonder..."Just what are we doing with our lives, exactly?" That's the feeling I had when I read this story about a 17 year old girl who ran away from her family in Ohio (which happens to be my home state) to Florida to get away from her Muslim family that threatened to kill her once they found out she became a Christian.

I'm nearly 4 years older than that girl, and I don't have nearly as much strength in my faith that she does. But young or old, no matter where you are in life, the strength of your convictions should not have anything to do with that. You either know what you believe...or don't. Or you're just too afraid to stand up for it.

Comfort and security are things that so many people, particularly in the United States, take for granted. Myself included. Christians in America whine about being persecuted when we are, in fact, the dominating religion in this country. We can go to church without having to fear for our lives, as do people of other faiths. While that's not to say that no Christian in America ever gets unfairly treated, the fact remains that there is a HUGE difference between discrimination, intolerance, and persecution.

We've got it made right here in America. And I wonder how many Christians would be so strong as to refuse to deny their faith even in the face of death. It's so unimaginable a concept to so many of us. And while "coming out" as a Christian hasn't exactly been a picnic for me, my story can't compare to Rifqa's. Now there is a young woman who can put many of us to shame.

I know we would all rather choose comfort over constant peril. But...is there ever such a thing as "too much" comfort?